Tuesday, July 18, 2017

The Shift

Baby me...

FACT: My mom won the door prize for getting old: cataracts.  She had surgery scheduled.

FACT: My dad was still in rehab, following a unexpected hospital stay.

FACT:  They needed help and I'm the only one around who can give it.   There are no other surviving relatives.   I may be the baby of the family but for now, I'm taking the lead.

If we're lucky, we have the blessing of having our parents with us for a long time.  If our parents age, we children have the difficult task of helping them navigate the transition to a new normal, where the definition of independence changes.  It's a tough road, and one that every child with elderly parents travels.  

And so a new normal takes shape.  One where abbreviations like MI (mobility independence) and ADL (activities of daily living) make sense and are thrown into sentences.  Where I make color-coded medication charts to simplify things.  Where home health care angels provide guidance and support, explaining medications and checking vitals (and double-checking charts to confirm I didn't make a mistake).  

I'm lucky.  Up until now, my parents have been very healthy. And, with the help of some new medication, home OT and PT, and diligent exercise, my dad will get better.  My mom's eye should be okay (though it's not a given yet, there's still follow-up to be done). And I will help as I can, thanks to the support of my family and the availability of lots of flights between NY and Chicago.

I'll be back here when I can.  For now, I'm off to the grocery store; I have some cooking to do.